Three tests to counter rumor-mongering
One of the fundamental implications of the Bhagavad Gita 16.2 directive to be averse to fault-finding is to avoid engaging in rumor-mongering. This means not [...]
Three ways to differentiate between punishing and scapegoating
The difference between finding a criminal and scapegoating someone can be broadly defined by three main aspects: Method: In the case of scapegoating, the accused [...]
Three reasons for differences of opinion
Differences in opinion can often lead to conflict, especially in today’s hyper-individualistic age. The tendency now is to view such differences as signs of incompatibility, [...]
Focus on who will be responsible not on who was responsible.
Whenever things go wrong, finding someone to blame is a default human tendency. When there isn’t anyone clearly to blame, we tend to presume that [...]
How to identify insecure people
When a candid evaluation of others is seen simply as a series of compliments and insults, then that person is seen as unreliable and not [...]
When others disturb us…
How we respond to others disturbing behavior reveals our character much more than whatever we might speak in words. Actions speak louder than words. This [...]
How to deal with loss
The best way to deal with loss is not by losing our temper, but by losing our attachments. Whenever we lose something, especially something that [...]
Proving point or improving viewpoint
Proving our point is counterproductive if we are not improving our viewpoint. Sometimes when we know that someone else is wrong and we go about [...]
When people behave strangely…
Just because some actions are inconsiderate does not necessarily mean that they are unwarranted or inappropriate. When someone behaves in a way that does not [...]
Why understand a wrongdoer
Understanding a wrongdoer is not justifying a wrongdoing; it is simply evaluating whether the wrongdoer is reformable or incorrigible. When someone, a person, or a [...]
How to use the fault-finding mentality constructively
Some of us may have an innate tendency to notice the things that are wrong in anything we see. Significantly, this tendency can be seen [...]
Three benefits of hearing open-mindedly
When someone disagrees with us, especially on an issue that is important to us, we may feel threatened. Consequently, we may hear them primarily to [...]
Ahimsa: Gita insights on nonviolence and deterrence
Ahimsa, frequently translated as nonviolence, is a concept drawn from the Indian tradition that has gained widespread resonance in today’s world. The Bhagavad-gita, India’s foremost [...]
The scapegoating tendency
Scapegoating is one of the most universal of human tendencies. When we face difficulties, especially difficulties that seem unfair to us, we seek someone to [...]
How gossip can go dangerously out of control
Suppose we pushed a small snowball down a hill just for fun. It rolls down out of our sight and we forget about it. But [...]
Are we rude to the crude?
Suppose we come from an urbane background and behave in ways that our culture considers well-mannered. Suppose we meet someone from a rustic background with [...]
What the faults we see in others tell us about ourselves
Our mind often sees outside what is present inside it. If greed or lust are present inside us, we immediately notice the objects that promise [...]
How to hold others accountable without becoming judgmental
Suppose police remain silent while a rioting mob lynches hapless victims. For such an alarming dereliction of duty, the police need to be held accountable. [...]
To be truly non-judgmental, stop being judgmental about those who are judgmental
If we are judgmental, we make snap judgments about people. We blame them for actions that were almost inevitable for them given their circumstances which [...]
Passing blame is easy but disempowering, accepting responsibility is tough but empowering
Whenever things go wrong, our mind naturally looks for a scapegoat. We want to blame others because it seems to be an easy escape-way: “If [...]
To be nice is not to be naive — it is to be free from the control of vice
Some people say, “If you are nice, you will be exploited by others.” They equate being nice with being naive, with the starry-eyed belief that [...]