Making judgments is a functional necessity in life. We need to make judgments about the kind of people we want to befriend, the habits or interests we want to pursue, and the places where we want to invest our money. If we don’t make judgments, we may end up acting unwisely and hurting ourselves or, worse still, trusting untrustworthy individuals who may manipulate and cheat us.

While making judgments is essential and desirable, what is non-essential and undesirable is being judgmental. The key difference between making judgments and being judgmental lies in the focus of evaluation. When we focus on what is constructive or non-constructive for us and choose our friends or social circle accordingly, we are acting from a position of healthy humility. We understand that we are influenced by our external factors and we aim to choose those externals that are conducive to our growth. Acknowledging our vulnerability to our externals is a sign of humility, and seeking environments that foster our growth is a sign of a healthy intent.

Unlike the healthy humility associated with making judgments, being judgmental is associated with unhealthy and unappealing arrogance and condescension. When we are judgmental, our attention shifts from how others affect us to how others are in themselves. For instance, during a pandemic, suppose we see a person coughing and decide to keep a distance from them — we are not condemning that person; we are just protecting ourselves from infection. This is an example of healthy judgment. However, when we place ourselves in a superior position, as might a judge, and affix a permanent label on the other person, we become judgmental.

While judgments act as a shield around us, protecting ourselves, being judgmental is akin to putting people in a cage. Ironically, the cage we place on them becomes a cage that limits our picture of them. What if our assessment of them was wrong? Even if it was right, what if they change for the better? Being judgmental prevents us from being open to these possibilities; it locks us in our past mental picture of them. 

Making judgments is a sign of the mode of goodness, which brings clarity, while being judgmental is a sign of the mode of ignorance, where our knowledge about others only increases our ignorance. As the Bhagavad Gita (18.22) explains, we end up acquiring knowledge in the mode of ignorance.

Summary:

Making judgments acts as a shield that protects us from unhealthy choices; being judgmental becomes like a cage that unhealthily locks us in our past mental picture of others. 

Think it over:

  • Why is it necessary to make judgments? 
  • What is wrong with being judgmental?
  • Explain with an analogy the difference between making judgements and being judgmental?

Audio explanation of this article is here: https://gitadaily.substack.com/p/how-to-make-judgments-without-being

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18.22: And that knowledge by which one is attached to one kind of work as the all in all, without knowledge of the truth, and which is very meager, is said to be in the mode of darkness.

To know more about this verse, please click on the image