Can’t hold the mind still?
Even if we can't hold our mind still, we can still hold ourselves still. Suppose a mother is trying to get her child to sit [...]
What is emotional maturity?
Sometimes when a person starts crying or lamenting or wallowing in self-pity when something goes wrong with them, when something they need or want doesn't [...]
Whom NOT to turn to for processing our emotions
When someone behaves outrageously and triggers within us strong emotions such as revengefulness or resentfulness, it is essential that we find a balance between expressing [...]
The transformative power of deep listening
When we are conversing with someone about a subject close to their heart, we can connect better with them through deep listening. Such listening enables [...]
The price for becoming wise
When we have some questions, we may hesitate to ask them thinking that others may consider us foolish for having those questions. Such a fear [...]
Is seeking social acceptance leading us to self-rejection?
As we are social creatures, we long to belong — we seek some group where we are welcomed, valued and respected. Unfortunately, this longing to [...]
How to be detached in our relationships
We are social creatures who need relationships to be emotionally nourished. Yet many traditions emphasize detachment as a primary requirement for spiritual growth. For example, [...]
Taking responsibility to help others choose wisely (Balancing independence and guidance series 7)
Taking responsibility to help others choose wisely - After Krishna concludes the Bhagavad-gita’s message, he asks Arjuna a two-part question: Has he heard attentively? Have [...]
How Krishna precedes enlightenment with encouragement (Balancing independence and guidance 7)
How Krishna precedes enlightenment with encouragement - In the Bhagavad-gita’s sixth chapter, Arjuna enquires about the fate of the unsuccessful yogi. In a question that [...]
How Krishna addresses Arjuna’s concerns empathically (Balancing independence and guidance 6)
How Krishna addresses Arjuna’s concerns empathically - In the Bhagavad-gita’s sixth chapter, Krishna outlines the process of dhyana-yoga. This process for attaining self-realization centers primarily [...]
Respecting others while refuting their misconceptions (Balancing independence and guidance 5)
Respecting others while refuting their misconceptions- When Arjuna surrenders to Krishna, seeking guidance about dharma, Krishna begins his response with words that can seem like [...]
How Krishna respects Arjuna’s independence before giving guidance (Balancing independence and guidance series 4)
How Krishna respects Arjuna's independence before giving guidance - Suppose we can give good advice to someone whom we are not officially or relationally obligated [...]
How to give guidance while respecting people’s independence (Balancing independence and guidance series 3)
How to give guidance while respecting people’s independence - Suppose a student seeks career guidance from an older relative. If that relative has previously been [...]
Why we may provide guidance without respecting independence (Balancing independence and guidance series 2)
Why we may provide guidance without respecting independence - Whenever we offer guidance, we act based on our implicit conceptions about what guidance is meant [...]
Why both independence and guidance matter (Balancing independence and guidance series 1)
Why both independence and guidance matter - When we are in relationships that involve instructing and inspiring others such as parenting or coaching, one of [...]
How to respond when someone hurts us?
How to respond when someone hurts us?- When someone speaks harshly or acts cruelly toward us, how we respond depends primarily on their disposition. The [...]
To avoid emotional extremes center your emotions on the eternal, not the external
To avoid emotional extremes center your emotions on the eternal not the external We sometimes experience mood swings, whereby small good things make us elated [...]
When we react to atrocity with fury we give the forces of illusion control over both sides of the war
When we react to atrocity with fury we give the forces of illusion control over both sides of the war Suppose two countries start fighting [...]
Those who don’t find the reprehensible reprehensible, are reprehensible
Those who don't find the reprehensible reprehensible are reprehensible Suppose someone sits and works and lives in a place that is dirty and stinky. If [...]
The causes of anger rarely hurt us as much as the consequences of anger
The causes of anger rarely hurt us as much as the consequences of anger Suppose someone insults us. Feeling angry, we lash out at them. [...]
To be compassionate, be both caring and careful
To be compassionate be both caring and careful Suppose a doctor is asked to travel to an epidemic zone to treat patients. To take up [...]