Disappointing God is just part of being human; distancing ourselves from him isn’t.

Whenever we strive to have a serious relationship with someone, especially a person whom we respect and who holds a superior position, such as a parent, teacher, or mentor, we naturally strive to please them. We also endeavor to avoid disappointing them. If they have specific expectations for us, we try as much as possible to meet those expectations.

When we fall short of those standards, we may feel apprehensive about meeting them or even being in their presence. This fear of disappointing them might even cause us to avoid them altogether. Such distancing may seem pragmatic if they are known to be short-tempered, intolerant, or aggressive. However, staying away would be unnecessary and counterproductive if their overall disposition is understanding and encouraging. By distancing ourselves, we deprive ourselves of their guidance and support, which could help us improve and eventually come closer to meeting their expectations.

This dynamic applies especially to our relationship with God. When we strive for a real and serious connection with Him, we naturally seek to be pure to come closer to the one who is all-pure. However, when we fail to live purely, we may fear that we have disappointed Him and consequently distance ourselves. We might avoid going to the temple, associating with devotees, or engaging in practices such as praying or mantra meditation, which bring us into His presence.

Such distancing is utterly unnecessary and even catastrophically counterproductive. It is unnecessary because God is with us and for us in our struggles to rise to a higher level of consciousness and purity. He doesn’t hold our slips and falls against us. He knows our conditions and conditioning—the many external temptations we face in today’s world and the powerful and sometimes deceitful conditioning that afflicts or ambushes us from within.

Indeed, we are not alone in falling short of His standards. If God were to become angry at anyone who fell short of His expectations and, in His anger, reject or punish them, then all of humanity would be hopelessly lost forever. Disappointing God is just a part of being human, and He accepts us despite the inevitability of our shortcomings.

In the Bhagavad Gita (9.30–31), God reassures us of His acceptance. He declares that even those who fail to act purely are still to be considered well-situated if they remain determined to be devoted to Him. He assures us that such individuals will soon be cleansed and virtuous and will never perish. This expression of God’s heart should give us the courage to persist in our struggles against temptations that steal away our purity.

Why should we let the fear of being too impure for the Lord keep us away from Him? Why should we deny ourselves His omnipotent presence, which can dissipate the darkness of impurity? By staying away from God, we starve ourselves of His supremely nourishing love—the absence of which is the very reason our hearts seek solace in non-devotional or anti-devotional temptations.

Of course, God’s unfailing love for us should not be used to rationalize or justify continued indulgence in impure activities. We must do our best, within our limitations and conditioning, to please Him and avoid displeasing Him. However, irrespective of our level of success in meeting His expectations, we have no reason to give up our relationship with Him. If we keep striving to come closer to Him, His omnipotent mercy coupled with our humble sincerity will elevate us beyond the pull and reach of our impurities.

Summary:

  • When we succumb to impure temptations due to provocative conditions or powerful conditioning, we may feel that we have disappointed God. However, He graciously accepts such shortcomings as an unavoidable part of being human.
  • Despite disappointing Him, we should never distance ourselves from Him, as He never abandons or punishes us for our failures. Instead, He remains our best resource for overcoming impurity.
  • By staying connected to Him and sincerely trying to please Him, His merciful benediction combined with our efforts will lead us to eventual purification.

Think it over:

  • How might we disappoint God, and why is such disappointment inevitable?
  • Why should we never distance ourselves from God despite feeling unworthy?
  • Reflect on a time when the fear of disappointing God caused you to distance yourself from Him. List three thoughts that can help prevent you from doing so again in the future.

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09.30 Even if one commits the most abominable action, if he is engaged in devotional service he is to be considered saintly because he is properly situated in his determination.