The power of words: be aware and beware
When we use something regularly, we may forget how powerful it is. Consider electricity. As it is widely available, we tend to forget its importance [...]
Three benefits of hearing open-mindedly
When someone disagrees with us, especially on an issue that is important to us, we may feel threatened. Consequently, we may hear them primarily to [...]
The difference between compassion and compromise
Suppose we are building a staircase to a scenic spot on a hilltop. Suppose we make the steps so big that people have to pull [...]
How to deal with differences of opinion
As each one of us humans is an irreducible individual, we all will have different backgrounds, experiences and perspectives. This will sooner or later lead [...]
Should we speak about our spiritual practices with our colleagues?
The above question may confront practicing spiritualists, given that we live in a professional world that is largely materialistic. In dealing with this mismatch of [...]
When being truthful is helpful and when it isn’t
Suppose our partner came to us and started listing out all our faults, which number over a hundred. How would hearing that list affect us? [...]
Why all insensitivity is not equal
We all are wired differently and we may just not have certain faculties. Some people’s minds may be so geared as to have low emotional [...]
How sensitivity differs from sentimentality
Suppose a doctor is treating a patient for a painful ailment wherein a boil needs to be cut. If the doctor is sensitive, they are [...]
How to become more sensitive
The Bhagavad-gita (17.15) recommends increased sensitivity of speech when it urges us to speak non-agitatingly and pleasingly. How can we develop such sensitivity, which essentially [...]
When calling a spade a spade doesn’t help …
In today's politically correct climate, not many people speak candidly; they understandably fear being condemned or ‘canceled.’ Amid such an environment, those who do call [...]
How to be detached in our relationships
We are social creatures who need relationships to be emotionally nourished. Yet many traditions emphasize detachment as a primary requirement for spiritual growth. For example, [...]
Are we being ‘nonjudgmentally’ judgmental?
Most virtues, when taken to an excess, end up becoming vices. Such is the case with the virtue of being nonjudgmental which protects us from [...]
Why it is difficult to be broad-minded
When perceiving things, our mind routinely reduces reality to not just convenient categories but also judgemental labels. Because our mind is inside us, it is [...]
Why it’s easy to be narrow-minded
The world around us is so complex that we need to reduce it to some simple functional categories. For example, suppose we need to ask [...]
Taking responsibility to help others choose wisely (Balancing independence and guidance series 7)
After Krishna concludes the Bhagavad-gita’s message, he asks Arjuna a two-part question: Has he heard attentively? Have his illusions been dispelled? (18.72) This question reflects [...]
How Krishna precedes enlightenment with encouragement (Balancing independence and guidance 7)
In the Bhagavad-gita’s sixth chapter, Arjuna enquires about the fate of the unsuccessful yogi. In a question that spans three full verses (06.37-39), Arjuna asks [...]
How Krishna addresses Arjuna’s concerns empathically (Balancing independence and guidance 6)
In the Bhagavad-gita’s sixth chapter, Krishna outlines the process of dhyana-yoga. This process for attaining self-realization centers primarily on cultivating equanimity of the mind toward [...]
Respecting others while refuting their misconceptions (Balancing independence and guidance 5)
When Arjuna surrenders to Krishna, seeking guidance about dharma, Krishna begins his response with words that can seem like a strong chastisement: “Your words are [...]
How Krishna respects Arjuna’s independence before giving guidance (Balancing independence and guidance series 4)
Suppose we can give good advice to someone whom we are not officially or relationally obligated to advice. If we advise them before they seek [...]
How to give guidance while respecting people’s independence (Balancing independence and guidance series 3)
Suppose a student seeks career guidance from an older relative. If that relative has previously been blamed by others for career choices that didn’t work [...]
Why we may provide guidance without respecting independence (Balancing independence and guidance series 2)
Whenever we offer guidance, we act based on our implicit conceptions about what guidance is meant to do. For example, we may see ourselves as [...]